Friday, June 8, 2012

controlling the chaos

Sometimes I just need to say things out loud.


It's been observed that condition of a person's home is a reflection of the condition of their soul. And if that's true (I'm pretty certain it is), then mine is full of good intentions and insanity. Sometimes I do really well at keeping the chaos in check... other days it just seems to have a will of it's own. It doesn't help that the house is daily subjected to a violent "toynado" that rips through with the intensity that only a 1 and 2 year old can achieve. It also doesn't help that all I really want to do right now is be outside - staring at little seedlings and dreaming of their potential, staring at little goatlings and dreaming of their potential, staring at the rabbits and thinking I really need to get them separated because of their >ahem< potential. It gets hard for me to focus on other things, mundane things like laundry and dishes and toys.. oh, the ever-present toys. Some would say not to sweat the mess, and just be happy with the things that make me happy - the seedlings, sprouts, and wee ones of all species, but the mess is making it harder to enjoy said small things. It's canning time, or nearly, but there's just no way I can tackle that job right now - the chaos makes it impossible. I'm itching to bake bread, to make things.. I've got a head full of things I want to get done, but the mess. Oh, the mess. It's days like these when I look at all our accumulated stuff, and I come very close to just chucking it all. One of these days I might actually just do it. I have a feeling that day will be both terrifying and glorious. Until then, I'm trying to work up the energy and focus to tackle the mess and bring it back under my thumb, for the tranquil, blissful 15 minutes that it lasts. Because after that, Maezie will unload her milk bottle on the carpet, Punkin will dump out a box of Cheerios, and Davey will decide that now that the house is clean, it's a great time to haul all the junk in from his car. And so it goes.

Wish me luck, friends, and a healthy dose of grace. I'm 'bout to rassle with the chaos.

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